I am mostly a positive, happy, optimistic person. However, I live in pain every second of the day. I go to sleep with it and I wake up to it, I’m still happy to be alive every day. I push through it to accomplish all I do, but it’s exhausting to do so and I end up accomplishing considerably less than my potential on any given day. It tries to interfere in everything do. It’s a struggle that’s been going on for a quarter of a century, as of this writing.
Though it’s been almost 25 years as of early 2019, the first 12 years (and 7 weeks) were much more extremely painful. I didn’t sleep without medication and I didn’t have medication for the first 3 years and some months. That first period caused a complete collapse of the life I’d built to that point. It forcefully generated severe decline in my life.
In 2006, a simple, little-known naturopathic procedure relieved the worst of it by removing the single most debilitation symptom. Other severe pain symptoms remain, but it’s a survivable level. After that treatment, a recovery of sorts began and still continues. Since I still have a great deal of constant, chronic pain, having a normal life has been a constant struggle. However, I have experienced quite a physical recovery after that 2006 and 2007 relief from NeuroCranial Restructuring. I had to recover socially after that, I had gotten, psychologically, to a point where I wouldn’t go places alone. My social and psychological recovery has been powered by a love for playing music.
Welcome to a formative blog. I began “Brains and Music” many years ago, but it sat dormant for a long time. I want to offer to the ether, my story of a recovery from a brain injury/chronic pain disabled guy into a professional, or at least semi-professional brain-injured musician. I want to add hard-earned knowledge from the perspective of one who’s had to endure a constant, intense and invisible struggle, a wrestling match with no break or recess all along. I want to find more answers to things I’m still unraveling about the experience.
After effects of suffering a head injury like mine leaves thinking a bit chaotic, and so this blog may, from time-to-time reflect that. For that reason, I’d love to find an editor or co-author to collaborate on helping to make sense of it all. This past year, I found new information, long after this page was written, and so am in the process of updating this log to reflect those details and how they apply to me. See the CSF Leak Foundation infographic.
Chronic Pain and Brain Injuries are both perplexingly invisible to those around us and little understood. I certainly tire of trying to tell the story. I’d rather simply refer someone here, to my timeline and these posts and web pages. It’s a work in process, and you may encounter a rant or two though I will try to edit those out, maybe.
My brief timeline describes how the ordeal unfolded. I’ll be posting observations, reflections, maybe even recommendations after a time. Thank you for reading.